Believe in miracles

I'm supposed to move on Saturday. I've known for a month and have been looking for someone to take my current contract for that whole time. With less than a week til moving day, my anxiety has been skyrocketing. I don't want to be stuck with two rent payments or have my current roommates have to foot the bill. Our neighborhood is very popular and it's never been a problem selling a contract, but the two girls who came to look at it just didn't work. One wasn't a good fit personality wise and the other kept dragging her feet and finally said she didn't want it.
Yesterday leaving work I was especially anxious. I've been moving forward with "faith". At least the motions of faith, doing what I could to find someone to take the contract. Yesterday I found myself despairing a little bit and thinking that maybe my new landlord could just find someone else to fill my spot and I could stay where I am.
I even messaged the new landlord with my woes and worry. Telling her I would need a miracle and that I didn't have the faith for a miracle right now. I didn't want to burden her but I didn't want the 2 rents and to burden my current roommates. Then I drove to the new place to unload boxes. When I got there I realized I was being ridiculous and went back and deleted the message, luckily it deletes it from her and me.
I felt good about the move although to be honest I'm not super excited about it. My room is half the size and the location is proving to be super lame with the jobs I'm looking at.
Anyway, last night I was in a panic and messaged to tell my roommates that I was going to offer it to the girl who wasn't a great fit personality wise because there were no other options. They asked me to wait until we could talk about it and at 10:15 when I got home I started talking with my one roommate. As we were talking I got my phone out and looked at facebook and saw I had two messages. One was from a girl asking me about the room. I hadn't seen it earlier in the day because it came from someone I wasn't friends with so it didn't show up. She sounds like a pretty good option and is going to come look at it Saturday. The landlord has also said we could pay $100 less on my rent this month since we are trying to fill it. The relief I felt was immense. Then this morning another girl messaged me about the room. So now I have two new options. Hopefully one of them works out.
I don't think it was my faith that did anything since I was feeling pretty faithless, but miracles do happy and the Lord is very merciful.
Here's hoping everything else works out too. It usually does.

The color of change

My 5th graders are writing color poems this week. We read Hailstones and Halibut Bones written by Mary O'Neill and illustrated by John Wallner. Then they had to come up with their own words for a color of their choice. They have to describe what it sounds like, tastes like, what emotion it is, what it feels like, what it looks like and smells like and then put those words into a free verse poem. I decided to I would do it too. I started on words for all the colors last week and today I chose orange for my color.
As I was working on my poem most of my words relate to Autumn which is my favorite season, but I still couldn't come up with another emotion word for orange, so of course I polled Facebook. As I came to the end it popped into my mind that orange is the color of change. I don't know that that is an emotion of that it fits into any of the other categories, but that's definitely what it is. The color of change. Out with the summer, in with the fall and soon it will be winter. We have seasons in our lives and change is inevitable. The other emotion words were anticipation, excitement, frustration, energy, joyful/happy, ecstatic, cautious, bold and wild. I love those words paired together with change. They describe what change is and how it makes us feel. I hope I can be bold, excited and full of energy as I face the changes that come into my life. That I can anticipate happy joyful things and deal with frustration and caution in a productive way.