Just like that

On the mission I would always tell myself I could do anything for 6 weeks. Transfers are 6 weeks long and I think they do that to save our sanity. Even when I didn't get transferred and was stuck in the same area with the same companion, there was that speck of hope, and knowledge that I could do anything for 6 weeks. There might be another 6 weeks of the same thing right after, but that didn't matter. Although I don't have transfers now, I am using that 6 week mark to keep myself sane. I can make it 6 weeks. Anything for 6 weeks. I just made it through my first "transfer" as a first year teacher. 6 weeks in and everyone is still alive! Just like the mission, there are a few people I wish could get transferred and some days are much better than others, but I'm learning a lot about myself and growing everyday. I'm studying Christlike attributes (read attribute, aka patience) and working hard to figure out what is going to work for each of my little "investigators".
Like learning a new language, teaching takes time and really immersion is the best way to learn. It doesn't always sound (look) exactly right, but if I don't try, it won't get any better. These kids need what I have to offer.
Despite being tired mentally, physically and emotionally, I feel fulfilled and I feel like I am making a difference for at least a few of these students. I'll get better, I'll still have bad days, but before I know it I'll be looking back asking myself if that really happened. Missing the people I met and loved and hoping the very best for them as they move on with their lives.
My life is the same thing over and over. It's disguised, but basically it's the same. Different people, different locations, but the same lessons just applied in a different way which I guess makes them new lessons. Life really is good. The hard times make you realize how you have grown and how you are growing. You can see how God is preparing you or was preparing you. God is good.

Highlights of a first year teacher Part 1

School is well under way and I am quickly learning that, like the mission, no matter how much people tell you it will be hard, you don't really understand until you are there. I hear having a child is the same way. You think you are prepared, you know it will be hard, you can do hard things, and then you're in the middle of it and you think "WHY THE HECK IS THIS SO HARD!?"
Last week the art teacher asked me to come and see her on my lunch break. I felt like I was being summoned to the principal's office. I thought to myself "what could they have done, they were only there for 15 minutes?! (there was a fire drill). I went in expecting the very worst report of my little gems and their behavior but I was surprised when she asked me how I was doing. :) She is new to the school so we were in training meetings together, but she is not new to teaching. She told me "you have a hard class". I felt SO validated. I thought maybe I was just the worst teacher there ever was and that's why they were so ridiculous.
Yesterday the P.E. teacher came in and asked me how I was doing and told me "you have a hard class". Validation again! With that validation still comes trepidation about what I'm going to do to reign this crazy class in. They are making progress, but it's slow and hard to see. BUT there have been some successes.
My little autistic boy likes to not do whatever we are doing. Our school follows love and logic for classroom management and I find it hard sometimes to give choices where I still get them to do what needs to be done. I went and talked to his first grade teacher and she told me to use recess for his choices. He can do whatever we are doing with us, or he can stay in at recess and do it with me then. It's been very successful. He also gets a sticker every time he participates with the class and when he gets 10 he gets a prize.
I have an emotional little guy who loves to hang on me. I'll be at the front of the class and he'll come up and hug me and just hang on. I hug him back and try to send him back to his seat but it only works sometimes. Most times he crawls under his desk or wanders around the room. His emotions also lead to outbursts of him shouting that no one cares about him and that he wants to die. After one particularly bad day this week, I went and talked to the school counselor and she came the next day to observe my class. She gave me some suggestions and I moved their desks after school. Friday was a ROUGH day. My kids were unruly and this particular child hadn't been in his desk longer than 5 minutes. After asking 12 or more times for him to sit in his chair and being at the breaking point for my patience, God took pity on me and sent some inspiration. I set a timer for 10 minutes and put it on his desk. I told him if he would stay in his seat for 10 minutes I'd give him a sticker for his sticker sheet. As soon as it went off, I gave him the sticker and reset the timer for another round. He sat and participated for 45 minutes! He finished filling his sticker sheet and had his prize on his desk when he came back from lunch! As terrible as the morning was, that one success made my whole day!! Hopefully it continues working. I went and bought 4 more timers yesterday and I'm going to try it with a couple other students, one who shouts out ALL.THE.TIME and two others who won't stay on task to save their lives. Even if it doesn't work, at least I've got two kids working in the right direction and hopefully that helps our class as a whole. They are 3 points away from a movie party so I'm hoping they make it this week so we can have some positive reinforcement for their good behavior.